Wo wo wo Mr Topham let's get it right it was "I'm sick of getting nailed from behind" which you should probably agree with after your sore arsehole the other week.

Well said skipper, its not over yet, we have to stay focusd. Just a few thing s to point out sean scored the third goal and it was 3 -0 at half time but minor points.
Good performance boys some really good passing moves, n u can see the differance. Using the wingers giving them space to run cross, shoot brings us to our better game, everybody had a good game, so lets take 9 pts from our next 3 and finish up that league.

N I THINK IT WAS " I SICK OF GETTING NAILED FROM BEHIND"

Good match report. Although I wasn't there I get the gist and can visualise the events.

Thought it was a bit harsh refering to Mercer as a 'freak' though!

Finally man!!!(am I sounding sad?? who cares!!), It's like waiting for the postie wi your giro waiting for these match reports man, such is the hunger, for your fair minded and unbias journalism!!I think we can blame young Andrew for the premature ejaculation buddy, with his hair stroking, ball tickling essay, which I clearly did participate in, and respond to, in my defence it was during a far too mellow hyllucagenic moment!!!, you know the SP pal.....
I take it all back, your all shit!!!,

Tried to avoid being drawn into the ratings game, but fuck it!!
Rossco p coltrain,7 (quiet day for ross due to the solid performance of the back 4, did what he had to do well)
Toby, 8 (first game for us in a good long while, only excelsior player who looked at the races for the first 15mins,Toby played at the same intensity for 90mins excellent bud)
Clarky, 8 (filling in at centre half for ("Andrew and Steve 'sorry lads, the christening of a child who I will probably never see again is more important than my team' Mcenzie");-), experience personified, the trademark 'over-me' apparently replaced by the cool back header,never looked in trouble, first class man!!)
Scholesy,8.5 (very little to seperate the back four today, Scholesy's talking and use of the ball just edges it for me, and therefore my MOM. quality pal)
Neil,8 (Becoming Mr.Consistency buddy, Energetic as always, well deserved goal, thought the goal from open play should've stood myself!! Offside Merce, not you man??
Merce, 8.25 (another great game for Merce, not far behind Scholesy for MOM, always looked dangerous and apparently much stronger than you look??)
Fiss, 8 (Strong, commanding and disiplined as ever, could be MOM every week, if more of the ball came through him!!, In fairness it is all about the team, and it seems to be working), still like to see us pass it more!!
Dance Mat, 8.25 (Great goal, great game,hitting a bit of form the last few weeks, another one not far behind scholesy(looks like a bit of a gang bang linin up here my ginger friend!!)
Wozza, 7.75 (Started well enough, but trying too hard let frustration get the better of you pal)
Seano, 8 (Started very well, but Woz's frustration, started to rub off, in fairness the game completely died away towards the end)
Ali, 8 (contributed well to play when introduced and never put a foot wrong, excellent pal)
Simon, 7 ( showed good energy, just needs to relax a bit)
Very little to separate anyone for me on Sunday chaps, hence the fairly high ratings throughout, good solid team performance, Roll on Wednesday!!, Fiss is dead right thought boy's let's save the bummin' for the night out, Flamingo's dressed as actual Flamingo's is Seano's very good shout,(anybody interested, speak to my missus Sara, who will supply you with a 'make your own costume template' highly sought after as my daugter won first prize on National book day, dressed as huge Gemima Puddleduck, she was subsequently awarded, by the Mayor no less!! a well deserved 20 pound WHSmiths book token, for her trouble!!, Alternatively Sara will personally tailor the costume for you for a very reasonable 147.00 each plus materials!!
Take it Easy boy's see ye wednesday!!

A big thank you to those who waited for the match report to be posted until banging in your ratings. Those who didn't - shame on you.

Here we go.

Ross - 7 - Little to do, some nice takes and good kicking
Toby - 8 - Great game, contributed really well
Scholes - 9 - Best game of the season for me
Clarkson - 8 - Made light work of making us look good
Neil - 8 - Top performance. Over lapped all morning and caused them problems. Defensively sound
Merce - 8 - Gave their full back a torrid 90 minutes, great game.
George - 8 - Did his job. Did the messy ugly stuff, that goes unnoticed by the glory boys, really well.
Dance - 8 - I told you he had it in him. If he didn't win the ball he kicked them. Perfect for me.
Wozzer - 7 - Played well. Starting to show that greedy side too much.
Sean - 7 - Didn't see much of the ball. Played well. The goals will come my friend, just let it happen.

Ali Kat - 7 - Not much time to do anything. When did played the easy stuff. This time next season.....
Simon - 6 - Just that header really. It looked easier to score than miss?

See you tomorrow
Fiss

Another good solid performance. I did think they were one of the poorest teams this year though. Fuck all up top.

Ross - 8 - Did everything he could well, clean sheet
Toby - 8 - Superb first game back, felt comfortable playing in front of him which doesn tget said about Toby very often!
Scholes - 8.5 - Faultless but not really tested
Clarkson - 8.5 - Composed as ever, again not overly exerted.
Neil - 8 - Full of running as ever, unlucky with the disallowed goal, never offside!!
Fiss - 7.5 - Solid as ever, not the most influential game he's played but thats because we are used to high standards.
George - 8 - Won the headers and broke up play well, just what was needed.
Dance - 8 - His best game for me, good goal, keep it up!!
Wozzer - 7 - Always a threat, bt too greedy at times.
Sean - 7.5 - Again not his most effective, but great running as usual.

Ali Kat - 7 - Didn't see much of the ball
Simon - 6 - Can only remember the header from him, enough said.

Good luck on Weds boys, got Wi-Fi access in hotel so will keep approving your comments and checking for updates.

Merce the Freak.

Yeah I agree with everyone Saturday wasn't exactly a hard game but in those games you can often drop down and play to your opponents level which we didn't end up doing and obviously it paid off.

Ross - 7 didn't have to do anything just some kicking practice for Mr Parker.
Toby - 7.5 played extremely well think that could be his position after only seeing if play in midfield this season.
Neil - 8 getting more and more confidence in Neil now looking to give him the ball more often.
Daz - 8.5 superb performance by my centre half partner made my job very easy today.
Merc - 8 didn't have to get out of second gear as he already seems to have the left back beaten before he even got on the pitch.
Danny - 8 superb performance from Dan, took his goal well would like to see him finish a game though cause still think he has more to give.
Fiss - 8 captains performance enough said. Dominant and never looses the ball along with George they are usually most peoples outlets.
George - 8 again superb performance in the centre of the park think it's the best midfield partnership we've got as himself and Fiss compliment each other.
Sean - 7.5 did what he had to do and got another goal.
Wozz - 7 Little greedy but I don't know what it's like to be within grasp of the top scorer award?
Ali - 7 didn't have much to do but when he got the ball looked accomplished.
Si - 6 erm.............header.

By the way Neil to your question no you can't have the next penalty I'm getting withdrawal symptoms from giving them all away. Got to give the next one to Ross as well not impressed. Think next season I might want to be the Ginger Ledley King Centre Half/Centre Midfield what you reckon????
See you all tomorrow lads let's rip into Ansdell form the start.

ross 8(not a lot to do but love it when he has a moan)
toby 8.5(sloted in well at rb looked up 4 it from the start)
chopper8.5(sorry chops but 4 a man of ur age ur experienced counted on sunday not up frount tho ha ha!!
scholes 9(ur confidence shon though pal,just wish it was every game)

danny8.5(took the pisss all game 2 silence his critics well done danny)
fiss 8(u wont get meny sunday league players playing with an injury like that,fearless)
george 8(dident get mutch time on the ball 2 do his stuff,but top of his game with the ugly stuff)
merc 8.2(like last week pal far 2 clever 4 there defence)

sean 8(bit of an of game but still danced the game away)
waz 8(cud of had a hat full on another day)

simon(i wud off comited suicide if i had a chance like that!!!)
ali kebab 7.5(growing with confidance every game,keep it up)

seans dad 10(fagging the balls out of the dike!!!!)

PS MY WEEK JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER AND BETTER!!!
O MIST A PLYER
JON ARNARISER 11(CRACKING HEADER)HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The shoulder charge was never a free kick (were we playing basketball? I dont think so), the moment of the match for me though was near the end when we got a free kick on the edge of the box. Wozza stepped up to take it, only to be pushed away by Fiss. Woz protested to which Fiss replied pointing at his beloved armband "when you've got one of these you can take the freekicks". Quality!

Interview with Manager taken from Auto Weld club website.
Thought you Excelsior lot might want to read this.

"He was then Asked, should Autoweld go up, will he be looking to strengthen the squad?

"I feel that the squad needs to be strengthened certainly. We have players that are not committed as others and to be honest I don't have room to allow for that. We are in talks with one player from another Club who is their Captain about a move next year. I have seen him play and he would fit into the side perfectly"

- who could he mean?

Autoweld you must be having a laugh there is not a sniff that our captain is gonna sign for you lot for quite a few reasons.
1. Because it's a treck and a half to play at your ground every week.
2. Because the team spirit and banter is ten times better then yours just look how you were arguing with each other on the pitch, even if your winning that is terrible.
3. Because it would be too easy for him to get in.
4. Because why sign for a team that is going to finish lower then your own.
5. BECAUSE YOU ARE TOSS.

Come down and watch a decent side finish out there season.